July 2012: One Man’s Treasure …

I had a yard sale.

Well. That was a learning experience. One of those lessons that only needs to be taught once. Yard sales are not for me.

(There should be a word for that. Learning experiences. Something that can be whipped out in the perfect situation, or whenever a family sitcom needs to have a Very Special Episode about Julie’s brush with a cocaine salesman or Uncle Jimmy’s colostomy bag (Hey, my hairy aunt had one for awhile. One of the oddest Christmas gifts I ever got.) I probably should have thrown another comma in there, although it really would be a Very Special Episode if Julie had a brush with both cocaine and colostomies (To be clear, I don’t think my hairy aunt ever combined the two.) Like I just had a Learning Experience about commas. Learning Experience. Lexperience. Expearning. The big LE. A Lesson Touch. Okay, now it’s just getting creepy ...)

Yard sales. Garage sales. Tag sales. They all boil down to one thing: gathering all of your unwanted stuff and trying to get people to give you money for it, before you take it to the local thrift store and donate it. Usually at night, when no one is looking.

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